Wednesday, 28 January 2009


So, I just checked the flight I want to take to the UK and it's GONE UP BY $100. SHIT! Stupid uni. I have a meeting to attend on Feb 10th. I want this sorted and done. I'm going to go email the woman from U Dortmund and have her send me the class listings if they're available.

I have no words

Tuesday, 27 January 2009

I could buy groceries...

... or I could buy this:

It's $38. It's the cutest thing I've ever seen. Except knowing me, I'd lose the letter part the first time I wore it.

Monday, 26 January 2009

I wish...

I want to buy these shoes so that I can become this girl, but somehow I don't think it works that way...

Also, I think it's more about the coat...

Getting my Wine-on.

So yesterday Bec, Emma, Michael, Simon and I piled into my shoebox of a car and drove to the vineyards for the day. After a tiny detour to Brisbane (jokes! but I did take the wrong turn - and immediately realised my mistake, so it cannot be seen as me getting lost), we went to my cousin's vineyard which is so very far away. Got there, drank all her desert liquers, bought one because I felt like I had to, then went on.

The next place was down the road and really cute (Simon thought the girl was also). There's this sculptures in the Vineyards thing going, and at my cousin's they had rhinoceri (sp?) and at this place they had a big hanging skeleton and a giant pick-up-sticks. Sorry, it wasn't pick-up-sticks, it was reminiscent of the children's game, but really represents the game of life. My bad. So altough this cellar was cute, as you walk in there's a pile of deer skins for sale wih the tag, "skins from our farm," which is a little disconcerting. Plus, there was a great big stag head mounted on the wall, complete with bullet hole near the eye. Lovely. This is probably incredibly hypocritical of me, considering the fact that I eat meat and wear leather, but it just feels so wrong to exhibit dead animals like that, almost as if to say, "Yeah, animal, how d'you like me now? I can beat you cos I have a gun."

Anyway, next we had a picnic lunch at the Hunter Valley Gardens. The boys did their man thing and barbequed, which is ALWAYS appreciated. Have I mentioned how much better food tastes when you haven't cooked it yourself. It's a fact. I read it. In a book.

Next we went to McGuigans which was a total bust. Much too busy and in the end we didn't bother. We tried some cheese though, so that was OK. After that it was on to Tempus Two. We were served by Alannah who was so lovely! She made us try a whole bunch of wines that weren't on the list so we could find some that we liked. She was so helpful and cheery and had wonderful descriptions of the wines, and when we found out she was going to U Newcastle sometime in the near future studying what Simon and I are studying it got even better. Wrote her a nice complement and bought a couple of bottles there.

Next we went onto Bimbadgen, our last stop, and who should I see but my friend Jemma, who I met in Chicago! She's working at the cellar there until she goes to London in five weeks. So weird to run into her after I hadn't seen her since 0-Ball. Everyone put in to buy me a bottle of wine from there, which was so nice, and then we headed home, everyone incredibly tired after a very long day.

Saturday, 24 January 2009


Things that are really difficult to do without contacts:
  • Your hair. Unless I'm standing with my face pressed against the mirror, all I see is a blur, but a blur in the Monet sense, and I think it looks good. Then I put my glasses on and get a fright. But try doing your hair with glasses on - not happening. And so, for the last week and a half, I've looked like a hot mess and have just stopped caring.
  • Your makeup. Bitch, please. If I can't see my hair, I definately can't see my face. And besides, the glasses cover up any attempt at eye makeup, so it doesn't matter. Or, maybe they don't, but I've become such a frump behind these glasses that I've stopped caring about covering up the dark circles.
  • Driving in summer. You know what would be nice? Not having to squint through the sun. I would love to wear my glasses but I can't due to the whole not-being-able-to-see thing. Some people are really particular about that.
  • Falling asleep watching TV. When I was a little kid, one of the neighbourhood kids was at my place (that stupid mole from down the road, Alicia, who was the only person in the entire world that has ever made a racist comment to me in my entire life and wasn't joking. Stupid bitch) and left a metal wind-up toy on my bed, which I didn't notice when I went to bed. I was about 5 at the time. I woke up screaming and had cut the corner of my eye on the toy. So I cannot even think about sleep if my glasses are on. These puppies are both metal and glass - imagine what would happen if I rolled over onto my stomach or something!
  • Seeing. The prescription on these is from when I was in year 12. I've been practically blind wearing these.

And the stupid optometrist is driving me insane because they have to order me trial contacts. That takes a week.

Also, I've been reading a lot of travel guides lately and even though the stupid uni won't do anything about the exchange until uni starts up again, I've been trying to start organising myself for the trip, because it is in only six months' time! And so...

Things that I WON'T be packing when I go overseas:

  • 10 pairs of shoes. Yeah, that wasn't my smartest move when I went to the US. I barely wore half of them, and they took up so much space! So this time I'll just bring: one pair of havaianas, a pair of black flats, a pair of walking shoes (maybe some mary-jane style Colorados), some dress shoes? and maybe my tan flats from Marshalls with the open toes. Oh, and my tan boots...So that's not a lot less. I could maybe cut out the heels, and just buy something cheap if I really need to, or just wear the black flats.... hmmm.... I need to think about this more...
  • 3 different photo albums. Really wasn't necessary, although two were gifts from my friends and were great to look through when I was homesick. But really added a lot of bulk. I won't need any photo albums. I have photos on the internet, my laptop and on my ipod. That's enough.
  • 2 towels. Did I really need the beach towel? How many beaches did I go to in the US? And my host family obviously already owned towels. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
  • The clothes that I never wore at home but suddenly thought I'd wear overseas. I didn't.
  • More than 1 book. I took so many books overseas and only read about 2 of the books I brought. I ended up buying a bunch of books and then having to lug everything home. And I ended up leaving a couple of books in the States, like that 2nd hand copy of Wuthering Heights from Martha's Vineyard that was so cute!
  • 2 suitcases. I want to be able to travel on those cheap-as economy flights. They barely let you bring one 15kg suitcase, let alone the two 30kg suitcases I had. I may need to purchase a backpack. Yuck.
  • A guidebook. I only brought one big one when I went to the US, but I only used it once, and it was crap. So no guidebooks for me.
  • So much jewelery. I brought so much to the US, many things I'd never worn before, and ended up buying so much more that there's no point. Plus, I don't really accessorise very much anyway.

Wednesday, 21 January 2009


Went for a walk this morning because I haven't been in ages. I woke up at nine though. I should have just given it a miss - it's already so hot by nine, and I'm not one of those people who's face sweats. Does that make sense? It was explained to me in science back in year 9 or 10 (whichever year I had Mrs. Touma) about how your face is supposed to sweat so as to cool you down. Well, I sweat everywhere BUT my face, which turns a lovely shade of purple. Good fun. It's only now, two hours later, that it's finally returned to a semi normal shade. Yuck.

In about 10 mins some people are going to come to look at the house. They're going to be really young - one of them will be 17. Imagine living out of home at 17. No thanks. I'm 23 and I wish I was still living at home.

I spent yesterday cleaning out my food cupboard after realising that somewhere down the line I had spilt soy sauce all through it. Great. BUT, it did allow me to see what was actually in my cupboard. Funnily enough I have four types of sugar in there - white, raw (unopened), brown and icing sugar. All were bought for things I've baked, although I think my grandma gave me the raw sugar (no idea why). Plus, I realised that all of those packets of recipe bases that Lara sent me from Germania expire in February, so I've got to get cracking. See? Silver lining. Except that even after I wiped everything down, it still all smells of soy sauce.

Last night I went and saw Bride Wars with the group. I do love my romantic comedies, but **spoiler alert** I'm tired of movies where they suddenly decide that the boyfriend isn't right for the girl, even though he has been wonderful the entire movie - think Sweet Home Alabama. I dunno, it just bugs me. Especially when they don't set it up properly, and midway through the movie start giving him a few crappy traits. But it still had a happy ending, and that's pretty much all I care for.

After that we went to dinner at a pizza place on Darby St which was very yum, then ice cream on the beach, or at least, looking at the beach.

Today's a bit of a nothing - just waiting for the landlords to come over and the people to look at the place... which was supposed to have been 10 mins ago ... then getting new contacts this afternoon, thank god. I've been wearing my glasses for about a week now and they're so old that everything's still really blurry. I was hoping to get both glasses and contacts, but money's tight, especially considering I have to go to the dentist tomorrow. I had to hit mum up for money. ARGH.

Cannot wait until my scholarship money comes along in April.

Sunday, 18 January 2009

Drama drama drama!

So Em and Mel came over for dinner and we watched Roman Holiday afterwards (Gregory Peck, sigh). Towards the end of the film we hear a girl scream, so we look at each other and go, huh? I thought it was a neighbour making a playful scream, but when she screamed again, crying "Get away from me," we all got a little worried, especially after it was followed by a guy yelling and banging.

We crept down the driveway and I, for the first time in my life, and hopefully the last time, called 000. And, everyone knows that I'm not the most concise person in the world, right? Well, add to that the fact that I'm whispering so my abusive neighbours don't hear us, I'm nervous as all hell and I have the shakes from the adrenaline coursing through me. I couldn't even remember my street name. I look at Emma and she's like, "Park something?" and suddenly I remembered I'm on Parkhill. Luckily the 000 call centre has magical maps because they were able to figure out the name of the cross-street where we think the house is (please, if I can't remember my street name, do you really think I'm going to remember the name of the street that joins it?). The woman on the phone also reassured me that I'm not just some nosey neighbour pokin my nosey nose into other people's business.

No idea how it all turned out, but I hope so bad that the girl is OK.

Friday, 16 January 2009

I don't know if I've mentioned it before...

... but I LOVE Oprah :P

God bless your real breasts!

Thursday, 15 January 2009

Decisions are hard


Currently trying to figure out which subjects to do this semester. I have 20 units to play around with and I've decided to do all history subjects as I'll have to be doing English subs in Germany. I'm also thinking that I should do Ancient history subjects because I do not want to go through the boredom that was last semester's World in the 20th Century. But then I realised that I want to do a sub called Issues in Australian History, which is 20 units, and a subject that is called The French Revolution and Napoleon, which is also 20 units. As hist is my minor, I can only do 50 units all up, and I've already done 20 units last year... so all up I'm screwed. Either I do Australia or I do the French Revolution. I'd much prefer to do the French rev, but I think because I'd be teaching so much Australian history it'd be much more worth my while to do the issues subject.

And have I mentioned that this uni is stupid because they don't have the subjects that correspond with the history syllabus?? One of the subjects I'll have to teach in year 7-8 is:
Medieval and Early Modern Societies:
- Vikings
- Medieval Europe
- the Islamic World
- an Asian country
- the Pacific
- the Americas
- Africa
- Revolutionary Europe in the 18th and 19th centuries.

Way to go, U Newcastle, not having any subjects (except the aforementioned French rev) that correspond.

So basically I've decided to do an ancient hist subject called Greek society and Intermediate Creative Writing 1.

Done. Can't back out now. Or I can, but I can't be bovered.

So Mary and Laura left yesterday. Sad to see them go, but thank God. Mary's so high maintence, but I love her. My bank account doesn't love them though. Oh My God. They were here for three days but I hesitate to check my account to see how much I spent cos I know it was a lot.

Funny thing Mary told me: her favourite teacher at school is her religion teacher, Mr. Fenech. Yes, Em (if you bovered to read this far), that Mr. Fenech, as is Damien. Lol. She thinks he's soooooo hot and soooooo nice and sooooooo ... By this stage I couldn't hear her over my dry wretching. Damien was in the year above us at school. What I don't get is how someone could go back to their old highschool to work. I understand that Ben, Ang's fiance has done this, but I just couldn't do it. I could never see myself as someone's colleague if they'd taught me and reprimanded me as a kid. But anyway, so he's working at Marian and has all the girls in a frenzy. :P

I received an email from a good friend last night whose grandfather has cancer and they've had to stop treatment and have given him 6 months. My friend asked how I dealt with the knowledge that Nonno was going to die. Honestly? I don't think I did. I was very logical and spoke with him about the fact that he was dying and we joked about it (every day when I visited him at the hospital it was the same joke: me- are you still alive, Nonno? him- if I'd known you were coming I'd have made more of an effort to make sure I wasn't. :P) but there was always some part of me that really didn't think he would die. If it weren't for the cancer he would have kept going for years. He was the fittest person I know, both physically and mentally, and it didn't seem very fair that he should get sick. I'm not afraid of death, and I wasn't afraid of Nonno dying. I think the saddest thing about death is knowing that they aren't going to be there for the rest of your life. Hello? It's been over a year and I'm still not over it. I still think of him everyday (not an exaggeration) and I still get sad. My friend is close with their granddad like I was with Nonno, so in a way, I know exactly what they're going through. But then again I have no idea what they're going through because it's so personal.

I am SUCH a Debby-downer!!

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

What a difference a day makes...

Woke up to the sound of lawn mowers. Thanks for that. Why do our lawn people come here before 9am. I'm sure it's illegal. If it's not, who do I get in contact with to stop this hate crime?

Anyway, so we hung around at home for a bit then went to the beach. Well, just before the beach I realised that I didn't have beach towels for the girls. I could have just used bath towels, I guess, but instead we stopped at Big W and bought some there instead. Laura chose a child-sized Spiderman towel. Basically if she lay on it her legs were in the sand. Smart cookie.

We met Beau there and ate fish and chips. It was just really nice. Oh, and I now have a very burnt shoulder. But still no tanner. This was driven home all the more by sitting next to Laura. We're basically that "Ebony and Ivory" song. Guess who's ivory!

Came home and my landlady came over to clean the house. Apparently on her way out she ran into Lisa and spoke to her about the smoking. She then sent me a text message saying that she spoke to her so it should be fine. I sent her a text back straight away to let her know that I didn't think it had worked because she had lit up straight away. And with her door open this time to really let the fumes run wild. Great. She had a friend over and they were drinking, a plot point that will make sense later on.

The girls were supposed to come to trivia with me this evening, but Mary was feeling sick so she stayed home. Laura and I went and suddenly everyone in the entire world was there. Everyone being 5 extra people. But that's a lot of people considering our usual group is around 4 people. We came seventh so we won some glasses - woot! And we also won some bar vouchers. Cos of our awesomeness.

Came home to the smell of cigarettes and vomit. Asians can't hold their liquor. That's not racist, that's science. I read it. In a book.

Friday, 9 January 2009

Getting old is expensive...

... is the thought I had as I applied my eyecream this evening. It's running out, it seems to cost me too much, and it's only a Nivea one, so it's pretty much the cheapest of them all.

In other news, Mary and Laura are coming up to stay on Sunday afternoon and I'm so effing excited. I'm like a little kid. Lame. Mary's driving me nuts though, little bratus. I've had to be on damage control cos she had decided that she hates Laura so she wasn't coming. She's very temperamental - decided she hated Laura because Lou used up all her downloads on the internet (it doesn't take much for her to hate anyone). So anyway, the best way to deal with Mary is to just not take what she's saying on board. So I steamrolled ahead and she's coming up with Laura.

Also, I ended up telling my landlord about Lisa. I had to call her anyway about Mary and Laura coming up, and I ended up just telling her. And she was sooooo not amused. Wow. You know how anti-smoking I am? I was being nice saying Lisa could smoke on the balcony. She was like, HELL NO - not even around the house. Wow. So that's that.

Also, it turns out that a series of text messages she had written me last week asking about what I was doing last weekend were for a purpose - she was inviting me to go with her family to "the bay". Does that mean Nelson Bay? I dunno. Anyway, she was feeling bad about my fighting with Dan (yeah, I've told the entire world) and how her daughter was fighting with her brother too (same age difference, two years, and the brother was at the Police academy at the same time as Dan and now works as a police officer. Coincidence? Yes, a very very big one) and how we're similar ages so she thought we could hang out.

Here's the thing, Jacqueline's (the landlord) daughter has a little girl and is just a couple of years older than me. She's been married and divorced. I'm so immature for my age so it doesn't matter that we're the same age, I just don't think I'd be able to compare. But I thought it was lovely of Jackie to ask.

Thursday, 8 January 2009

I am a Stupid.

So, I was so excited about Nicole coming up this weekend. I planned a day at the Hunter Valley and was ready to get all Sideways and say stuff like, "I detest merlot. I only drink pinot noir."

And it's not going to happen because I am a douche and didn't write my work times into my diary correctly. I thought I had Saturday off and so I told Nicole to come up. Yeah, turns out that of course I don't have Saturday off - me, have a weekend off? Hells no! So yeah, I'm working. Nicole is tentatively scheduled in for the Australia Day long weekend (remind me to NA it at work).

So anyway, that sucks.

Had the dentist appointment. I thought I was having problems with my wisdom teeth. It turns out that I don't actually have wisdom teeth. She kept asking if I'd had them removed, and I'm sure that's something I'd remember, but then I started doubting myself...

I had a pleasant shopping experience with Emma this evening. I ended up finding the stuff I was after, and I bought some blush as well, which was a lot more than I'd want to spend but I had a Westfield voucher so it was like it only cost $10. Then Em and I acted like 15 year olds trying on dresses on all the stores and throwing them over the changeroom walls to swap and compare. Lots of fun.

Oh, and I don't know what to do about the Lisa thing. I was all set to speak to my landlord this afternoon but she didn't answer, so I just left a message asking her to call me, which she hasn't done yet. But now I've chickened out a bit, especially because when I came home today Lisa was on the balcony smoking, so that's good, right? I dunno. I know I'm not in the wrong if I tell the landlords, but I also feel bad. Stupid toxic guilt.

Catholic Church of Australia, Take Note:

If one of these guys were my priest, I might resume attending Church.

And yes, I'm going to Hell for having impure thoughts.

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

See? I'm not allowed to be happy!

After the loverly day I had yesterday, of course today would suck. How dare I be in a good mood??

Went to the dentist today. I got there early because it's my first time at that clinic and that's what the receptionist told me to do. I get there, I'm told the dentist is running 20 mins late, I say fine, I settle down with a book.

40 mins later, good mood is waning. I go up to the receptionist and I'm all, hi. What's up? And she goes to check and something "unexpected" has happened so the dentist is going to be at least another 20 mins.

Good mood is gone. I say that I really don't want to be waiting any longer (that will have made it a whole frigging hour!) and it's my one day off work (lie). Seriously, if she knew that the doctor was running 20 mins late when I got there (11:20), why didn't she just call and tell me that. I would have gone for a coffee or something. (Obviously, by this time in anger the dentist deserves my coffee breath.) So yeah, it's rescheduled for tomorrow after work. Fun.

So then I decided to go shopping at Charlestown because it's the only Myer around. First, Charlestown has become annoying because suddenly streets you used to be able to turn down are no longer available to you. Second, I was stopped at a set of lights when the pedestrian crossing signal turned green. People crossed, but not the man on the side that I was driving on. When it went green, he began to tighten the straps on his pants (hard to explain what this means). When the lights began to flash red for the pedestrians, and everyone else had crossed the road, and it did that flashing amber lights thing for cars, he decides that that is the time to step onto the road. Not cross it, mind you. Just step onto the road in front of me, and just stand there. So I'm in a bad mood already, and I'm so perplexed wondering what the eff was going on, so I beep at him, just a little toot, and give him a "what's going on" shrug.

I forgot I'm in Newcastle.

Of course he then starts walking towards the car (I quickly lock the doors) and starts hurling abuse at me. Of course he does. Anyway, eventually I duck around him and get to the shops in order to find ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Actually, I lie. I did find a pair of cheap, canvas shoes I'd been looking for for a few weeks now, but that is all. I didn't find any of the stuff I was hoping to get. GRRR.

So I came home in the stifling heat and just sat and watched The Office.

WHY WON'T IT JUST RAIN ALREADY????? It's been looking like it's going to rain all freaking afternoon, and I just want it to cool down already.

Oh, and Lisa is smoking in her room again. I don't know what to do.

Tuesday, 6 January 2009


As I write this I'm sitting at my desk with the fan focussed on me and eating some banana bread I just baked. Yummy.

Had a really good day today. First I got up early and went for a walk. That's not so good, especially cos it's so hot that I couldn't dry off after the walk or after my cold shower, and it took me forever to dry my hair because I also had to be drying my back. Lol. But it was still fine.

My morning was spent breakfasting, coffeeing, and browsing through cute little clothing & knicknack stores, a 2nd hand book store (off loaded a tonne of books I was just going to give to Salvos anyway, picked up 4 new books as well as made $5 - hells yeah!) and a comic bookstore with Beau and Simon.

Got home, watched Dr. Phil (well, napped through Dr. Phil) and Oprah, baked banana bread, spilt nail polish on my dress and now I'm off to trivia.

Anyone know how I can get nail polish out of clothing? Very annoying, although the colour is too cute - it's an orangy-pink and it reminds me of that peel-off nail polish you wear as a kid.

Sunday, 4 January 2009

Oh Hell No!

My housemate has been smoking inside the house. Oh no she did not! Y'all know how much I hate cigarette smoke, but people chose to smoke and I respect that. All the smokers I know are respectful of the fact that people around them don't smoke and so they make an effort. This is a non-smoking house. I was fine when Lisa was smoking on the front balcony. That's cool, whatever. She'd close the glass door when she was out there so nothing could get into the house. Then yesterday I smelt smoke outside her room and it had spread through the house. It was outside my door, but luckily not in my room. I wasn't going to say anything, just in case she had just left the screen door open to the balcony when she was smoking (which happens to be outside my room. Grr), but just now, when I know she hasn't gone outside her room today, I went to do my laundry and there's smoke outside her room again.

And now I have to say something to her. I hate doing this. I hate when people put me in the position where I do this. But smoking inside a house I have to be living in is unacceptable. I don't want to be around it, and I don't care how much of a nark I sound like.

Friday, 2 January 2009


Nicole McDougall is coming to visit me next week! So excited, and in preparation I have begun to clean my room. So far I have opened a bag of garbage bags. The rest will happen, naturally.

I spent the day with Kate and Liz which was good fun. We went to the beach for a few hours and then I gorged on fish and chips. I randomly got slightly burnt on my upper-right thigh. It now resembles a ham.

I other news, we're starting to plan Angela's hen's night, although it is more a hen's weekend, and I'm starting to worry. First, they want to do one of those stripper cruises like Studs Afloat. I know that this is standard hen's night tom-foolery (such an underused word!), but have I mentioned before that male strippers make me dry heave? The thrusting, the fake tan, the body oil, the g-strings (also, when did g's start being called "g-bangers"? not a fan), the obvious over-indulgence of protein skakes = vomiting a little in my mouth. Yeah, that's my idea of a good night out. And ew, the guy on the website has a nipple ring. Ew ew ew ew.

So apparently we're staying in a hotel that night, then the next day doing pole dancing lessons, then having dinner at a Greek restaurant in Parra, then the next day is some pamper thing and then the Bridal Shower. Phew. So much. I've opted out of the pamper thing because it already looks like it's going to cost a heap, and I've said I'll set up for the bridal shower. That weekend is going to be so exxie - first the present (what's the going rate for the shower - $100?), then the accom costs plus everything else. So not in the mood.

Thursday, 1 January 2009

Oh, and

continuing with my love affair with Gabriel Garcia Marquez's Love in the Time of Cholera:

He recognised her despite the uproar, through his tears of unrepeatable sorrow
at dying without her, and he looked at her for the last and final time with eyes
more luminous, more grief-stricken, more grateful than she had ever seen them in
half a century of a shared life, and he managed to say to her with his last

"Only God knows how much I loved you."

So I've decided to start doing what Oprah does (stop hating! This is a good idea, and I'm not just doing it cos Oprah does it. Or at least, it isn't the only reason) and that is to underline the passages that I love and put a little post-it flag on them. At first I felt bad about doing it, but I'd love to go back and read just those passages.

Speaking of books, I only managed to read 25 novels this year. That's compared with the 57 novels I managed to read in 2007, but that said, for half of '07 I was practically a stay-at-home mum with nothing better to do, and then for the other half I was unemployed or casually employed. And this year was nuts with uni. And yes, I keep a list of all the books I read. I started in '07 to keep track of what I've read so I don't double up too much, even though I still do love to reread.


So New Year's wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. The plans were always to go to Michael's and have a small BBQ get-together with singstar (yes!), but at work yesterday afternoon I found out that all these people I really do not like were coming (apparently having invited themselves... che embarrassato!) so I was expecting the worst. It was a surprisingly pleasant night and I got quite drunk, to my annoyance, but I felt I needed to in order to distract myself from some of the people there.

Funniest thing though - Michael's ex's new boyfriend texted Michael one of those "send to all" New Year's greetings, and I was like, Oh HELL no! First, why would he have Mike's number?? Secondly, don't be sending one of those coupley texts to someone after the horrible breakup. And thirdly, this guy has wanky Sonic the Hedgehog hair (that point is obviously integral to the story). So I got the number off Michael and called this guy and was like, "Who is this??? I hope you have a horrible new year and your hair is fugly and so's your face." At least I think I said that. I don't really remember. But then started a texting fest which cracked me up this morning when I reread it:

*all text is as originally written
Him (H): Whateva! Dont hate! Happy new year.
Me (M): I hate. Fuck you and your face. And your stupid hair.
H: I must have a wrong nmber. Sorry! I am not friends with weirdos. U dont know me so even pretend 2 start.
M: You and your face are ridiculous.
H: OK well my dad is a cop so i will just past this on.
M: Well so's my brother. So you're welcome.

Then the ex-boyfriend called me and I have no idea what he said or what I said, but I'm sure it was hillarious, and I'm sure I made such witty comments as, "I hope your year is horrible" and "You and your boyfriend can have ugly hair together."

Yes, I am 12 years old, but, bitch, I don't care. I was drunk and it was fun. And reading the messages this morning had me cracking up, especially the "You and your face are ridiculous" remark. WTF?! I am the one who is ridiculous!